Have you ever felt like you are supposed to flourish but you’re just stuck?

You tell yourself you don’t have the time or you’re too busy or it’s too hard right now to do the things you know you’re supposed to. Maybe you can start later or next week or on a Monday.

I was once in a relationship that became super dumb. Those are the nicest words I have for it.

At first it was not dumb. It was great and fun. We laughed and frolicked in fields with daisies.

But then it happened. You know those people who get a boyfriend or girlfriend and then they disappear? That was me. I became needy and insecure. That, my friends, is not cute.

Finally, I started to associate this relationship with everything that held me back in life. I thought this person was the reason why I did things half way or not at all. That probably wasn’t fair to them. Okay, it wasn’t fair at all. For me, my relationship with this person represented my tendency to settle for less than God’s best.

I was willing to settle on my calling, on my relationship with God, on my health and my purity all because my identity was wrapped up in who I was with. I was miserable.

Was it their fault? No. It was mine.

I wasn’t flourishing because I was looking for nourishment in the wrong place. As a result, I became unhealthy. Literally. I turned to this person for my identity and to food for comfort. I battled with frustration everyday because the thing I found the most comfort in made me feel so uncomfortable in my own skin at the same time.

It took me a long time to realize this. The idea that this was how my life was supposed to be was very hard to let go of. And to this day, I consistently have to surrender my desire to find comfort in food to God.

“The righteous man will flourish like the palm tree, He will grow like a cedar in Lebanon. Planted in the house of the LORD, They will flourish in the courts of our God. They will still yield fruit in old age; They shall be full of sap and very green, To declare that the LORD is upright; He is my rock, and there is no unrighteousness in Him.”

— Psalm 92:12-15

God created us to thrive, to flourish. The only way that happens is when we are planted in His house.

Do you remember the old adage, “My house, my rules”?

When we are planted in God’s house we’ve got to submit to doing things His way. But when He is our source, not our own effort or strength, His way is not burdensome. It’s life-giving.

Friends, we will never flourish by finding our purpose or identity in anything but God.

We will never flourish by focusing on our failure.

We will never flourish when our worth is found in what we do or don’t do.

A plant that is flourishing bears fruit. And we are supposed to do the same. When we are trying to pull nourishment from a limited source it will be impossible for our lives to bear any kind of lasting fruit. Instead, when we fail, we will find anger, bitterness, and resentment.

We wonder why we can’t get it together sometimes. Maybe it’s because we are trying so hard to be our own source or we are looking for help from things we were never meant to.

Jesus said that we have been chosen to bear fruit and that the fruit we bear would remain. Abiding in Jesus, finding life in Him alone, and being planted in God’s house is the only way that will happen. [[ John 15 ]]

Relationships, jobs, parenting, position, money, even food. These things are bound by time and have an end. They will eventually dry up because they were never meant to be our source.

The world needs what God has placed inside of us.

This is what God has been showing me lately: He wants us to use our talents, our energy, our passions, our character, and the fruit born out of our lives, to point people to Him.

We have always been part of the plan.

You and I, we have got to be honest with ourselves. Are we looking for fulfillment from a source other than what God provides? Because if we are, then whatever it is, is robbing us of our effectiveness. And it’s just not worth it.

I’m gonna be real, I love food. But sometimes food is more than food. It’s a source of comfort. I know God has given us food to enjoy and that’s great. Thank you, Lord for food.

But when I’m stressed my first thought shouldn’t be, “I need a cookie”.

So, yesterday I started a Whole30. You can learn more about it here.

The Whole30 is all about “no scale victories” because many times the attachment we have to food goes far beyond weight.

I’m sharing this with you because I’m ready to move on. I want God to be my source and I want to flourish in this area of my life.

As you’ve been reading, have you identified anything you look to as a source apart from God?

Is there something God wants you to do?

I want to hear about it in the comments below!